Family, ain't they something to say the least!

IRONY

I hate, I'm mad, upset, pissed, and totally dejected. It is not just about what our family has done to us, but more so about what we can do to change and improve our families. "I rant and rave and cause a stink, and still it remains the same." Irony is that many times this cycle of disfunction, that most of us certainly are born into 9 times out of 10, doesn't revolve around us nor is it something we can change in a day. It might be something that went wrong some many times over and over again before you were even aware of the problem. We take family as though it were something finite and concrete, a commodity that can be order over the internet or from the car dealership in certain colors with racing stripes. Family is something that you have to either deal with and make the best out of the situation, or run the other way from. Running, sometimes, will have a positive effect on the runnee, but most times ends up bringing the runnee right back to the original situation. Sometimes it takes a minute before you end up back where you started, but ultimately either you or the people that you love will have to deal with the situation. Okay, okay, okay... not really fight, but more or less put in a good attempt, a strong try to make it work. Now,.... that doesn't automatically make you the sovereign ruler of your family... passing down all the issues for you solely to deal with, but it does either make you a apart of the problem or the solution.

Solution or Problem... that's the real issue at hand. I find it is so easy to sit back omnisciently and make observation about any situation that you know history about, and family is one such situation. As you grew up out of the subservant yet humble beings that many of us started as a child, you begin to question and wonder why things are good or bad. After the initial step of analyzation most people jump right into ...not denial, but blame. I think this is strictly a human trait. I have surveyed the animal kingdom and have never seen a gazelle or elephant display such traits. Blame is a dangerous thing that everyone can and has been a part of. So, are you part of the problem or the solution? Think hard.... it is easy to point the "finger," but harder to redirect the "finger" and find the true issue that needs to be dealt with. Family is something like art, personal & delicate, but strangely it is simultaneously open & strong. It is everything you want & need and can be none of those things at the same time. It is strange thing but so familiar.

The solution, I believe, is really as simple as recognizing that people are not perfect and neither are the we. No family is great as you believe it is. Life and family are simply what you make them... work hard at it and put time.. like your life. LIFE, which can either be short and or long, fulfilling or empty, but it is will be... exactly what you put into it. So, maybe the solution to any problematic family is to take a step back look at what you can contribute, and enjoy all the great parts and work on the not so great along with everyone else that is willing to work with you. Tell me what you think.